Pointless Nonsense

Posted in tv by Bill on January 26, 2012

Touch looked like a mix of Mercury Rising and Knowing, but it turns out to be considerably more emotionally manipulative than I could’ve possibly expected. Just absurd amounts of cheesiness. And an emphasis on fate, which always pisses me off.

Kiefer Sutherland is a single father who busts his ass at his blue collar job to take care of his special needs son. Also, he’s a 9/11 widower because that makes it sadder. And the government is going his son away! That’s, too, is because that makes it sadder but also because it brings Gugu Mbatha-Raw, an improbably hot child services rep, into his life. Together, they discover that Kiefer’s kid has magical math powers that predict phone numbers where Kiefer is needed to save lives or something. Also, Danny Glover knows all about the magic math powers, but reveals nothing even remotely helpful.

Elsewhere, a smartphone that no one ever charges travels around the world recording stuff and taking pictures and doing all sorts of shit over the course of what seems like weeks. But again, never needs charging. And results in a ridiculous Rube Goldberg solution to a bunch of characters’ problems all at once.

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